Beginning death

As Nathan died, he slowly closed his eyes thinking Why did that f$@#er just stab me? And then all he knew was light, for an eternity there was nothingness, just drifting in a white empty space. Nobody only vague awareness of light. Then something started to happen, his essence, all that was him started to swirl into a black open portal that had just opened up. He opened his eyes, what eyes!?!? He had a body!!! Good morning said a rather old Buddhist monk. Nathan sat up from the cot he had been lying down on ,He could only think of one thing to ask, Jesus? No chuckled the old man, he comes in after your service is done, all paradise, beaches, child hood pets, all the sweet stuff you could want. But until then you must serve in the earth sector defenses. Every one else goes straight to heaven and sit and enjoy all that is good. But some special few get assigned to the service, to defend the planet that they have originated from, and some times they get to partake in a foreign exchange military program. As Nathan was opening his mouth the old man kept talking right over him. How am I special? The old man asked, your special because inside of you is the imprint of a beast from from you planet waiting to be unlocked. ok Said Nathan. The old man blinked, nothing elese just ok? well ya said Nathan, I kinda died, I remember geting shanked by like a 6 inch blade. veary well then Training starts tomorrow and the old man got up and left the small bamboo room. Wow this is crazy Nathan thought. He decided to lye down for the time on a small cot. Crazy stuff he thought as he drifted off to sleep.

Moments that suck

He had fought through a horde of guards, beasts, and one black wizard. Now all David had to do was to cross the empty court chamber and stab the emperor where he sat on his throne. It had been easy to enter he reflected that one open servants door had been all anyone could ask for. He passed through the doorway he had been hiding behind and made a break for the emperor. Half way to the emperor about 1/10 of the royal army stepped out from behind the marble pillars that dotted the gleaming chamber. The emperor looked at him with a superior air and asked before you die mongrel, tell me how did you gain entrance? Still shocked by the guards David replied, a servants door. The emperor raised an eyebrow turned to a centurion that had come to sand behind him and said, told you, pay up Alexander. The prisoner? Asked the man called Alexander. Kill him replied the emperor. Davids last thoughts were, crap, this sucks.

Disney mixup

Have any of you ever considered what could happen if Disney studios got some of their stuff mixxed up? It would be utter chaos with the impressionable children of our world getting mixxed messages and stuff. Donald duck gets mixed with pirates of the Caribbean and BAM!!! we have a duck fighting skeleton pirates. And we have a pants less Orlando bloom hanging out with a female duck called daisy. WHEN WILL THE DUCKEY TYRANNY END??? anyhoo what if Mickey mouse and George of the jungle got mixed up? George would have to be clothed do all sorts of stuff while hanging out with a pantsless duck, a humanoid dog thing (or whatever Goofy is.), and a weird dog named after a planet. And Mickey would instantly be trampled by a mouse hating Shep (Georges pet elephant). What is the world coming to?

These writings have been the product of a rather large brain twitch and I hope that no one is offended. And if any one from Disney is reading this please don't have me assassinated.

DEATH TO BOREDOM!!!!!!!!!

Another thing everybody wants

So your out being a super hero with your monkey sidekick and horribly you turn your back for one moment to get a slerpey and BAM!!! Some supervillain (not even a really powerful one. Probably some one like Dr. Orange juice, or the Door Bell of Doom.) just death rays your monkey. What do you do now? Your monkey is dead. Go ahead and get what everybody wants more than a monkey, a VELOCIRAPTOR!!! Sure a monkey is fuzzy and intelligent but who wouldn't rather have a velociraptor on their side? So in conclusion if you chose the velociraptor you will get 5 wishes, the chicks (or guys if you are a girl) will dig you, and you will become immortal. Choose the now irrelevant monkey and instantly die with only time enough to slap yourself (hard this time.)


DEATH TO BOREDOM

Doom of the Earth

Ya all know how the worlds going to end right? The truth is that all of the earths cars are transformers! You cant find any thing wrong because the robots that make all the new transformers make the structure right but insert nanobots that start to change the cars as soon as they have passed all the futile tests that the factory uses to make sure that the cars work properly. And then all the cars wait in the car lots and those that are bought sit and study their human byers. They all wait for the signal to come so that they may feast. Cars don't really live on gas and oil but these things only sustain them, the cars survive on flesh, traveling from world to world consuming flesh in whatever form of transportation those peoples use. Why use transportation you ask? It is easer to transport the peoples, and who would expect the unintelligent beast of burden to be biding their time so that it could feast one day soon? these are ancient, they can wait, and they are powerful enemies. The earth is doomed! DOOOOOOOOMMMMMMED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BWA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA SNORT GIGGLE HA HA HA HA HA HA WHEEZ GIGGLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am human. I am also sane. This was all the creation of a active (if not overactive) imagination. I realize that this is not real and I hope no one will start a cult from this ranting. DEATH TO BOREDOM!!!!!!!

Real Life

There are 3 questions here.

What is real life? The definition is

Function: adjective: existing or occurring in reality : drawn from or drawing on actual events or situations

So real life would seem to be what is happening to you, what problems are affecting you, and who is affecting you.

How does it affect you?

It doesn't just affect you it is every thing that affects you. From your first kiss to a fire burning down your house. Some people think that real life is all drama and pain, not so, that is only half of what it is, it also includes picnics, good books, and good friends real life is just plain life.

And last of all why am I writing this?

Because my mom is making me.

The Two Things Everyone Wants

The two things that everyone wants is a pet monkey and physic powers. With a pet monkey you can mess around, eat bananas (because you can't eat bananas by your self, you can get jail time for that.) swing on vines, What ever you want to do its a monkey man, teach it to play X Box. And with physic powers you can do anything from bringing yourself more toilet paper when your out in the middle of something, to setting the mailman on fire for no real reason other than you can. or you can get really creative and become a supper hero and have a monkey as your sidekick, you can go save every one except Japan (They already have to many super heroes and guardian monster dudes.) So the over all point of this ramble is that Monkey= Fun & Chicks and that physic powers = fun and setting random stuff on fire.

DEATH TO BOREDOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! & more !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!